Saturday 7 July 2012 (posting this today because I was being a chicken sh*t)
OK. Right now I'm in a Starbucks--don't judge me-- trying to get myself out of this funk. Here's how everything stands: I've been back in NYC now for about a month. I've been auditioning, getting back in touch with friends, and occasionally babysitting. I've been claiming unemployment--yes. Me. I feel somewhat apprehensive about taking unemployment as I am a capable, bright, able-bodied young person with more than a few good years of work in her. It's something that most artists have had to take on occasion in between work or to help supplement their incomes, especially New Yorkers as they live and work in one of the most expensive cities in the nation. Kiplinger.com named NYC the no. 1 most expensive city and says, that "A New Yorker would have to make $127,935 a year to have the same standard of living as someone earning $50,000 in Fort Smith, Ark., the least expensive city." Isn't that nuts?! So here I am in the most expensive city in the nation, an actor, unemployed. Yikes.
I should say that I am very blessed in that I actually have work lined up for the Fall of this year and early Winter of next year. I also have representation--a commercial agent AND a legit agent, both very established. So as actors go I am actually doing pretty well. So why do I feel tired just thinking about my future. Shouldn't I feel excited, inspired by what is to come, or rather what is right in front of me or not yet discovered yet that I can make grow?
I write this knowing and feeling like a whiny b**ch, but I do so in the hopes that some of you out there, artists or not, may have felt this way before and so that we can commiserate. And so here I am recording my experience--embarrassing details and all.
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